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Flirting 101

Post date: 2007-06-09

Men will always view the woman as a mystery; a code that needs to be cracked. That is why flirting with a woman can be a little tricky, as they tend to have moods that we may never understand.

The art of flirting and seduction, as with any other skill, does not always come naturally and can be developed. With some effort, in time you would become a magnet for other people.

Smile – This is probably the easiest form of flirting. It brings out your positivity and you are indicating that you are interested to the person you are talking with. But unlike a “regular” smile, a “flirty” smile should be wider than you are used to. Smile often, such as when shaking her hand, introducing yourself, complementing her, among other things. Remember that a smile breaks the ice, and can lead to a conversation. Practice your smile in the mirror and check how to smile without looking too scary.

Get caught looking at her – It may seem to be something shy guys tend to do, but looking away can be flirty. If you want to know to let her know you are interested, just look at her face. When she catches you looking, smile, hold eye contact for a moment, then look away.

Wave a little – Another way of flirting if you get caught looking at a hot girl is to give a little wave. Move your hand a little and smile. It's saying “hello” in a non-intrusive yet very flirty manner.

Wink – Giving a quick and sweet wink can be done with someone from across the room, or at someone during a conversation. However, it is best not to wink excessively. If she says or does something she might view as embarrassing, you can give out a wink as a way of sharing a little moment for just the two of you.

Be creative in introducing yourself – It is important to seduce her mind first. Using the right words would get in her head and have her thinking about you. Also, make her feel comfortable as you talk to her. Women like to talk so establishing a rapport with her is not as hard as it might seem. Just remember to think of the right words before saying it and be sincere in your conversations.

Eye contact – Looking (not staring) at her longer than normal would provide the right message that you are interested to her. Remember to keep your look on her face, glancing on other body parts for a few minutes every once in a while.

Complement her – Open conversations with her by complementing. However, be careful on what you're complementing. On your first meeting, it is best to focus your praises on her face and not on her body (even if she looks hot).

Check her body language – Most men fail to realize the importance of body language. Women tend to make certain body movements—and they are usually unaware of this—indicating whether or not they like the man whom they are talking to. For instance, combing her hair around the ear using her fingertips is a good sign that she likes you. Other notable movements include eye contact, trying to heighten or lower her voice just to match yours, and if she is leaning closer. However, do not consider one movement as the overall impression. If she crosses her arms, it could either mean she is being defensive at meeting new people or being uncomfortable towards you.

Humor her – Having a good laugh provides a healthy conversation between you and her. She creates a positive impression of you, which is vital if you want to establish a relationship with her. However, remember that sense of humor can be relative. What can be funny to you can be horrible for her. Try to tell her a joke that got you laughing and see if she reacts positively.

Keep the positive – Maintain the positive topics that you use in the conversation. Remember that talking to her should be fun and leave the intelligent exchange to the philosophers. Avoid topics that usually lead to dispute such as religion, politics, past relationships, rants, and other negative discussions.

Talk a little more, but not about yourself – One objective to flirting a woman is to know more about her. However, keep yourself a mystery as much as possible. Not talking too much about yourself would make women longing to know about you more.

Touch lightly – You can touch your prospect without harassing the girl. This can be as simple as placing your hand lightly on her hand for a moment, or touching her back for a moment as you walk to a table to sit down. Touching is actually a good indicator to know if the girl is interested to you: if she pulls away, then she could either be not interested or just not wanting to go on a deeper level yet.

Make decisions quickly – Taking your time choosing the perfect coffee blend or looking at the restaurant menu does not give a good signal to the woman. By making decisions quickly and firmly, you are proving to her that you know what you want.

Be patient – Take things slowly. If she doesn't want to be touched on your first date, then don't force it. If she is the aggressive type, try resisting her. Either way, she would be intrigued more about you.

Do the “goodbye compliment” – If you are really shy to approach a girl, you could simply go near her before you leave and say something like, “Hi, I have to go now, but before I did, I really wanted to let you know that you have a really great smile, and I noticed that. I wish I had more time to spend with you, but I have to go.” After doing your “goodbye compliment,” leave as soon as possible even if the girl wants you to stay some more. This allows you to build your confidence in approaching women without having to take the risk of rejection. If the girl seems interested to you, ask for her phone number.

Know when to stop – Remember to stop flirting while it is still fun. Flirting too often during a conversation may make you appear as cheesy. If you stop flirting on a high point, your new friend may feel good when thinking of you, and want to see you again.

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