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The Art of Breaking down a Personal Ad

Post date: 2007-06-27

People who are in search for romance usually post in personal dating ads whether on print or online. These ads have been a resource for those who are also seeking compatible romance. However, we may end up frustrated after learning that the “recent picture” your date posted was taken 10 years ago.

How do we evaluate personal ads? How can we be sure that the person who posted is the real deal?

Check the photograph closely – Online personal ads usually have photos of those posted the ads attached. Eliminate ads that feature photos of people taken twenty feet away from the camera, blurry photographs or pictures of people with heavy make-up. They are most likely posted by people who are older than they claimed.

Stick to head shots – Head shots or half-body photos of prospective daters can give you a good idea on what they really look like. However, if the person covers his or her face with the digital camera while taking a personal shot in front of a mirror and merely exposing the body, it could be either be the person is unattractive or not confident enough.

Avoid photos with “props” – Some personal ad photos may include objects other than the person in search for love. These props, like a teddy bear, gold chains, sports car, or even a big house on the background, take the attention away from the person and probably seeks for people who who love them for their props rather than themselves.

Check out the expression – Scan the person's facial expression and check out if he or she doesn't look like a deer on headlights. If you are attracted to his/ her eyes or smile, then it's a good sign.

Inspect the person's clothing – Does the person went all the trouble to dress up for the occasion or appears to have just woken up?

Check for spelling mistakes – Read the person's biography and inspect its quality. A well-written profile with minimal or no spelling mistakes is a positive sign that the person is well-educated.

Pay attention to the profile's tone – How the profile is written can give you information about the individual. If they try to write about anything but themselves, they are probably evasive. If it is written in a sarcastic tone, then probably their humor is a defense mechanism that will one day be used against you.

Avoid complainers – People who complain in their ads should not be considered, as well as any references to emotional recovery, addiction, mental illness, or personality disorders.

Look for provocative language – Profiles with sexual overtones like “horny” or “a bull in bed” may simply wanted to look for casual sex rather than a serious date.

Ignore ads that seeks without introducing one's self – Avoid profiles that seem to concentrate too much on what the contact is looking for in a partner but mention very little about the author.

Ignore ads that has too little information – If the respondent in the ad did not bother to write more than a few words about themselves, ditch it. If they don't have enough energy to write a profile, they probably won't get off the couch to meet you.

Check if the person's lying about age – An minor who poses as an adult can easily be spotted by the language he or she uses, as well as bad spelling. However, older people pretending to be younger are harder to recognize, but you need to read between the lines.

If it's too good to be true, reply anyway – You may find a profile of a wealthy brain surgeon who is looking for love online. After checking anything stated above and all signs are positive, then it is best to reply to the ad, even when doubtful. Make sure to exchange mails (and probably even pictures of each other) several times before finally meeting face to face.

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